This one trait makes you a good employee but a bad negotiator


Hi Reader,

Ever notice how most top performer at work, especially in tech, are great at over-communicating?

Whether it’s Slack threads at midnight, Asana updates, or alignment calls with three different teams—over-communicating is a hallmark of high achievers.

It keeps stakeholders informed, prevents surprises, and gets kudos from your manager.

But here’s the catch:

That same habit can backfire in negotiations.

Why “Over-Communicating” Happens

You’re likely juggling multiple projects with geographically-dispersed co-workers. Success often comes from being crystal-clear at all times—which is fantastic for daily workflow and team collaboration.

Why It Hurts in Negotiations

Unfortunately, sharing too many details (like the details of other offers you have, personal reasons you want the job, or your preferred salary) can quickly lower your leverage. Anything you share may affect how high the first offer is, how much higher it can go, or whether you get an offer to begin with!

Real talk:

Telling a prospective employer you’re targeting a salary of $x will likely make them not give you a dollar more, even if they have a much higher budget for the role.

Or telling them you’d like to eventually move to Bali or have a bigger family in the next year may make them not extend you an offer altogether.

Even if it's illegal for employers to consider certain details such those around family planning, you don't want to risk even subconscious bias to work against you.

Three Ways to Dial It Back

  1. Practice “Intentional Silence”:
    When asked about your current compensation or other offers, respond with, “I’m sure we can find an arrangement that reflects the value I bring. May I ask what your budget for this role is?” Turn it around on them—no need to fill the pause with details.
  2. Filter Your Story:
    It’s okay to show enthusiasm. Just don’t overshare. Frame your excitement around the role and the impact you’ll create, not your personal or financial matters.
  3. Use a Negotiation “Buddy”:
    Before replying to any offer or recruiter email, practice with a mentor or friend (or us at YourNegotiations.com if it’s a mutually good fit!). They can tell you if you’re accidentally giving away too much. Even a quick role-play can save you from a misstep, as practicing and rehearsing is priceless.

The Bottom Line

In your everyday job, over-communication is your superpower.

In negotiations, it can be your fatal flaw.

Learning where and how to set boundaries on what you share (and when) is crucial to landing a higher salary, better benefits, or flexible work terms.

Got a big negotiation coming up?

Book a free strategy call with us, or hit reply to ask about your specific situation.

We’ll help you keep the conversation clear and direct—without oversharing your leverage away.

Keep crushing it,

Gerta & Alex
Co-founders of YourNegotiations.com

P.S. If you find yourself second-guessing every word you say in a negotiation, check out our previous newsletter on three negotiation pitfalls—even seasoned pros sometimes slip up!

Hi, we’re Gerta & Alex. 👫
We’re Harvard, MIT, LinkedIn, and Instagram alums and we share negotiation tips to help you
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Gerta & Alex are the founders of YourNegotiations.com, where they help executives and mid-career professionals negotiate job offers and business deals. Their backgrounds span tech (LinkedIn, Meta / Instagram, Salary.com), biotech (Sanofi), the US Air Force, venture capital, and building venture-backed companies. They're Harvard, MIT, and Wharton alums and have helped hundreds of clients add on average $100K and up to $1.7M to their compensation packages.

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