Hi Reader,
Virtual negotiations workshop - Tuesday, July 8 @ 11am PT
Before we dive in, sharing a virtual event we're cohosting next week with Mabel Chan, founder of the tech community superconnected! Bring all your questions, from running an effective job search in tech to negotiating your way to a stronger comp package.
See you Tuesday, July 8th, @ 11am PT. RSVP here.
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The mindset shift that unlocks 5-6 figure comp gains
In most of our newsletters, we focus on tactics and strategies: what to say, when to say it, how to respond to pushback, what to expect in an upcoming negotiation.
But this week, we’re zooming out to talk about something more fundamental: your negotiation mindset.
The topic of mindset came up recently when a client told us, “I get what you’re saying on what I need to do. I just have a hard time actually doing it.”
What they were really saying: “I need help with my mindset.”
Below are a few mentality shifts you should adopt going into negotiation conversations. Embody these different perspectives, and you’ll enter every negotiation from a position of power.
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Mindset Shift #1: You’re not asking for a favor.
When you negotiate, you're not rocking the boat. You're not being ungrateful. You're not “lucky just to be here.”
You’re exploring whether you and the company can make each other better off.
You're collaborating with them to see if there's a version of the job offer that works better for both sides.
For example: say the company needs someone to start ASAP. But you wanted to take a vacation first. If they can offer a bit more money, you’re happy to cut your time off short.
Now you both win. That’s not a favor; that’s a better deal for both of you.
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​Mindset Shift #2: You have to do what’s best for you.
(And that may mean not playing by the company’s rules.)
Managers will say things like: “Let me know early if you're ever thinking of leaving.”
But that’s what's best for them, not necessarily for you. You don’t owe them advance notice if your next opportunity isn’t solid yet.
Same with job searching while pregnant. We've had clients wrestle with when to disclose this news: at the start of the job search, after receiving a verbal offer, after signing the offer?
We always come back to this: You don’t owe an employer vulnerability while you’re still unprotected.
Think about this this way: if the roles were reversed and the company was in your shoes, would they do what’s best for themselves or best for you?
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Mindset Shift #3: Don’t take what they say at face value.
A recruiter saying “we don’t give written offers until you give verbal agreement” isn’t a law of the universe.
It’s a request — and sometimes, it’s a test.
When a company asks you to “if you give us a verbal yes, we can move forward in the process” or “send us the other offer letter so we can match it”, what they’re really saying is: “Please give up some of your leverage so that you make it easier for us.”
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Mindset Shift #4: Negotiating is a game, and you’re allowed to play.
Once you internalize this, everything shifts.
Recruiters respect candidates who know how the game is played.
We’ve seen them smile and laugh on calls when our clients elegantly dodge salary questions and they realize they’re not going to get what they’re looking for so easily.
It’s like a nod of respect: "Okay, this person knows how to play the game."
Negotiation isn’t about being uncooperative or deceiving. It’s about understanding the rules, protecting yourself, and playing your cards well.
And when you do all that with professionalism, cordiality, respect, and enthusiasm, you often end up strengthening the relationship, not harming it.
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Warmly,
Gerta & Alex
​Co-founders, YourNegotiations.com
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P.S. Know someone who could use our help?
Refer them and earn $500.
We’ve paid out thousands to people who just made a simple intro. If your friend becomes a client, we’ll send you $500—no strings attached; just our way of saying thank you for spreading the word.
Simply send an intro email to alex@yournegotiations.com and your friend.
See all the details of our referral program on our website here.